When Shame Comes Calling | Breaking Free from the Spiral

Ever been caught in a shame spiral where you feel and speak the worst things about yourself? This message walks through the story of the woman caught in adultery to show us how Jesus responds to shame - and the four steps we can take when shame comes calling.

💔 The Reality of Shame: Shame doesn't just hurt emotionally - it literally causes our brains to disintegrate. The part holding shame goes offline from our reasoning brain, isolating us from truth and grace. But when shame is calling, Jesus is calling too.

📖 Four Ways to Respond When Shame Comes Calling:

1. REFUSE THE ISOLATION

• Shame tries to make you feel worse than everyone else

• It separates you from the crowd and blinds you to your real name: Beloved

• Remember: "I am not alone. I am not worse off. I don't have to hide."

2. REMEMBER THERE IS MORE

• Shame only tells one side of the story (where was the man in her adultery?)

• Every decision you made, you made for a reason - there's context

• Give yourself access to the full truth, not to excuse but to understand and heal

3. REACH FOR A DISRUPTION

• Jesus bent down and wrote in the dirt, shifting all attention from her shame

• Shame spirals need someone steady who can slow the spin

• Call on your people to tell you a different story than the one shame is screaming

4. RECEIVE HIS HEART TOWARD YOU

• All the condemning voices walked away - only Jesus remained

• "Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more."

• There's only one voice that matters most

🧠 The Neuroscience of Shame: When experiencing shame, our prefrontal cortex goes offline and we can't think coherently. Our logical processes become unavailable, leaving us overwhelmed by emotion. Understanding this helps us recognize when we need intervention.

💡 Practical Tools:

• Visualize yourself in the circle with Jesus silencing the condemning voices

• Ask "What am I believing about myself right now?"

• Remember shame dies in safe, vulnerable relationships

• Practice asking Jesus: "Who do you say that I am?"

🎯 Perfect for:

• Anyone struggling with shame spirals or negative self-talk

• People dealing with guilt over past mistakes

• Those who feel "worse than everyone else"

• Anyone needing to understand the difference between guilt and shame

• People seeking freedom from condemning inner voices

🙏 Let's Connect: What's your shame tape? How has it been isolating you? Share in the comments if you feel comfortable - sometimes speaking shame out loud is the first step to breaking its power.

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